Fifteen years ago today Grant William McLennan passed. A few days later I read about it in the morning paper. As the confronting words echoed in my mind as I sat in my bed drinking my first cup of tea for the day all these moments flooded through my memory of all the possible chance meetings helping me to reflect that perhaps we are all connected in a bigger picture to help us run the race of our time of being human till we meet again in eternity.

I published in 2017 my book ‘Called to Stand’ and added my song lyrics that I penned on the Monday morning in 2006 when I read about the death of Grant William McLennan from The Go-Betweens in the newspaper. The verses were jotted down as the Holy Spirit presence poured over me bringing back memory after memory to the fore whilst I wrote and God’s Glory flowed upon me and streams of tears rolled down my face.

The words unveil and began to impart a bigger picture of the moments throughout my life that God the Heavenly Father was revealing in the intricate connections of many on a journey back to Him and perhaps the reason for the disturbance at my bedroom window on that weekend of Grant’s passing.

It was the death of Grant McLennan that seemed to link it all together. God the Father reminding me of the meeting in the park, Grant McLennan and The Go-betweens connections and the third big moment in my life with many little surreal moments that took place. I realized my personal events were about a future that was bigger than us.

MOMENTS in TIME

I used to watch the bands play in Albert Park
Never realizing the impact you would be in my life
I met you at dusk was it at Albert park or
Perhaps the Livid Festival at Queensland Uni
I said you have the most beautiful soul I have ever seen
We chatted about God, you asked me out
I said no, not ready, perhaps in my thirties if we meet and are still single
God said, “you are beautiful”

Was it you
Was it You at all
What does it all mean
 But a moment in time

From time to time I would see the band play
And listen intently to your beautiful voice
I would watch as you played with your back to the crowd
Is this because God’s glory shone from your face
Your jean clad bottom moving in rhythm to the music

I always found myself in God’s place as I moved to the music
I see now that I was being filled with the presence of the Holy Spirit
Somehow I never made it to your solo gigs
Always ended up at Ed Kuepper’s
I wasn’t real fussed on his music
I heard you were bipolar, was this true
I prayed for you
I prayed that the dark powers would stop oppressing you

I went to The Schonell to see ‘What the Bleep do we know’
I approached the man selling tickets and thought, “I know you”
There was silence, we silently stared at each other
You held my bank card and continually read the name on it
You would not let it go, I had to ask for it back
I thought if I was not in this place, how nice it would be to chat

Was it you
Was it You at all
What does it all mean
 But a moment in time

I went to the Sunbar, to check the place out
A bald man blocked my path with his arm
I said, “We’re not staying, my friend thinks there is no beautiful people here”
I said, “I think she’s wrong” and paused
As I left I heard him on the phone, “Robbie the girls are here”

Was it you
Was it You at all
What does it all mean
 But a moment in time

I had not seen the band play for years
I said to the Lord “please let me go, it may be the last time”
What did that mean, I shrugged
The Tivoli, the last place I saw you play
I ran into a man in the foyer

Was it you
Was it You at all
What does it all mean
 But a moment in time

Months passed and I was awoken in the early hours of a weekend
I heard outside my room an angry voice say “Call her”
Three times they spoke and each time the more aggressive
Did you make him go away
I was in God’s hands and I knew I was safe
I read the paper on Monday, you passed away

I took the day off work to go to your funeral
I accept a rose at the door in remembrance of you
Whilst everyone else was sad, I was full of joy
You belonged to God all along, this I soon knew
You belonged to the Heavenly Father, you knew Jesus
I watched as a small boy reached up to the sky
Was he grabbing a rope to be pulled up to Heaven
Or a balloon on a string as you handed it to him
(hold tight I could hear being said, don’t let go)
I barely knew you, but it felt like I knew you a lifetime

The tribute at the Tivoli, my niece got me tickets
I went and listened and heard the best of them play your songs
I saw again at the corner of my eye a young man who glowed
I did not face him, he was there a long time staring, watching

Was it you
Was it You at all
What does it all mean
 But a moment in time

I could have written more but I ran out of paper. Two other verses I was to write and include that morning, but I didn’t as I felt that surely this is already too many verses for a song. I wrote them much later.

I heard her too, from my Spring Hill bedroom 
The beautiful sounds that filtered through
evocatively calling to my room on the hill
Awakening me to sounds she blew on her wind instruments
As it floated through on lazy weekend days
I listened intently to where in the street
It could be coming from
I thanked God for the pleasure of the music

I was at the club that night
You harassed me
Kept saying, “I was the one”
You said, “You were missing your plane for me,
You were packed ready to go”
I said don’t, don’t miss your flight for me
Go now and catch your plane
I am not whoever you think I am”
I am just me
I left with the bouncer that night just to get you off my back

I could add to these verses and write about the time my sister suggested I go and see Jack Frost, a music collaboration between Grant McLennan and Steve Kilbey (The Church band) who was playing at St Paul’s Tavern on the weekend.

If I had too.

Or the time you (a man like you) drove on by at the bottom of the corner of my street (and Water Street) as your lyrics popped into my head, ‘if you saw me driving by in a car’. On that day, I would have gone anywhere with you. I soon knew later it wasn’t you, just one who looked like you.

If I had too.

Or the time I was at the La MASCARADE Ball – The Truth about Love and had heard The Go-Betweens were presently at Brisbane city town hall. That verse would end with, ‘if this was true, I would have hung around to see you’.

If I had too.

Would you like another verse?

I chose and entered through the discrete side door way
I take the flower from you
Paul Kelly as you offer it to me
I pause to drink in its fragrance
The singer-songwriter stops and lingers
Taking in my actions as 
I grace the floor of the cathedral
to take my position to see what was about to take place

Robert Forster called my verses a poem, I like to think of it as a song without music written about one of Brisbane city’s history makers. After noting author Desmond Manderson published a book titled ‘Songs Without Music: Aesthetic Dimensions of Law and Justice’. I figured there still is hope that my poem is not actually a poem, yet a song without music. Who knows? God knows.

I never wanted to be a writer. Let alone jot down lyrics for a song. Don’t let the world tell you, you can’t do it, just jump over every hurdle they place in one’s way to stop you showing and sharing your creative talents and knowledge.

I personally am hoping all these connections God will reveal with everybody else’s in some big movie scenario, for I believe this would make great entertainment value to pass the time during the thousand years of peace. Grant wanted to make movies too. ☺♫♥

Did The Go-Betweens sacrifice fame and fortune for the greater good of all or did someone sabotage a road to financial wellbeing and brilliance of sound…

Furthermore:

Yet still a bigger picture was being displayed of the star wars of the opposing spiritual practices of good versus evil. That which God the Heavenly Father has revealed to me on my journey and has confirmed in His written holy breathed inspired word (Holy Bible) of the equipping of the ‘Holy Spirit’ and the damaging ways of the ‘Spirit of this world”.

Revelations that there are forces at play that are ending life before one’s time. And the people are being harmed and destroyed for lack of knowledge.  The book of Hosea shares in chapter 4 verse 6 ‘My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge.’ (Hosea4:6) Was Grant a victim to this? My moments surrounding this time seems to have me think and suspect yes.

If only Grant knew when the world plays dirty one should use the only spiritual authority available to shut the harm down being thrown at them. Seek the Heavenly Father’s disciplining in these situations or learn to call upon Jesus and use what He has equipped His people with. Don’t take the bullying. Jesus Christ saves and aids when the devils come firing their arrows at one. Use the armour Jesus has equipped us with as Ephesians 6:16 states ‘Above all, taking the shield of faith with which you will be able to extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one.’ Speak rebukes as Jesus did & Archangel Michael spoke, “The Lord rebuke you…”, for the situations being thrown at one.

Stay connected to Jesus Christ seek and ask for His healing and strengthening upon your body everytime. Keep standing strong in Jesus as I have learnt to. Still standing.

God bless you all, stay focused and united.

Thanks for helping to wake me up Grant.